New perspective. (Deeper into despair)

Sometimes it takes reading the same thing over and over again; sometimes it takes a simple author's constant nagging and moaning over the plight for life, "short as it might be"... To change your view on things.

After having spent years discussing whether life is a right or a gift, the point of existence; that eternal question of life, the universe and everything, or the philosophical validity of the strong anthropic principal; I think I've broken through and fallen deeper still into the valley of despair (a joyful and beautiful valley, mind you).

It's regarding the end of the universe, the end of all life (same as we all know we will someday die, yet secretly hope that day will never come):
Although it's been a long time since I've come to truthfully embrace my eventual death, at first, I had managed it by holding on to a particular sense of continuance: the mark of my having lived becoming forever etched into the fabric of existence; the joy brought forth by my own, particular, threads woven into reality and the rest of life. All the while sustaining myself by the notion of existence itself being unending, of having a way around some particularly threatening physical observations (more precisely: the laws of thermodynamics).

Today, or rather, just now, I realize I have let go of that fundamental (at least to me) hope that for someone, somewhere, at some time there will always be a "tomorrow".

I now feel comfortable to think that existence itself, the universe, will be no more. Accepting that eventually there will be no life as we know it, or ever be able to know it. Thinking that someday, this fanciful fabric of existence, through which my actions transcend, will as well cease to be now fails to rattle me in terror.

It's as if I've disintegrated all life, and then not only said: 'hey why not?', or 'what would a good question to 42 be?', but then had the chance to play with it, only to have it away, without achievement, without meaning, unwaveringly, inconsequentially, simply lost it, abandoned it. Voided life.

Our current reality is that in all likelihood, such a thing will happen; eventually...

To which I've responded from this gorgeous valley, this almost literal oasis of life:
'So what?! It's still worth enjoying!'

La vida es un viaje no un destino..

Si la vida es un viaje, y no un destino?
Si solo llevas rumbos y paradas;
sin objetivos culminantes,
  solo pautas y recomendaciones,
Si nunca llegas, pero siempre estas?

Cuando concientemente, ves tus pasos dejar no solo huellas sino ondas,
bailarinas, con sus miles de compañeras desplazandose, sobre la superficie de la existencia
Ves tus pies gastados, les preguntas
  "Por fin, a donde es que me llevan?",
alguna vez te llevaron a recitar poemas en un parque?

Te sientas
  y recuerdas felizmente por donde te han caminado...
En ese instante dudarías de la frase "el fin justifica los medios"?
Si tu realidad solo concibe del "medio"?
Sacrificarías el presente por el futuro? El futuro por el presente? Como se camina por este nuevo terreno complicado,
cuando ya vemos nuestras huellas, sus ondas, las de los demás, y donde irá el próximo pasa de nuestro andar?

Quizás el cargo de ser seres concientes es sabes balancear el presente caminar con el futuro caminar?.. Moldear nuestros pasos en el eterno avance de la existencia sobre el vacío. Seguro que también esto incluye saber cuando reir... :D

Why so quiet?

Children have a very clean unadulterated mode of argument.

There is a fine line between complexity and chaos... Maybe that is why we should always head the words of simple minds...

- Aunt, are you a girl or a woman?
- A Woman
- And, can you have children?
- Yes, but I don't want to right now
- Oh

This dialog with a child reveals an Aristotelian handling of logic. It also reveals how easily accepted new information becomes incorporated as truth.

Evolution.. under pressure

This article and its related investigation are a testament to the speed evolutionary trait modification can take place when the stakes are high.

These changes have been taking shape in as little over a dozen generations!

Moscow's Stray Dogs Evolving Greater Intelligence, Including a Mastery of the Subway

Of Karma and Justice

First of all, it is important to agree that Justice involves interactions within a group, in a world of 1 justice makes little sense. This would suggest a definition of Justice along the lines of:

Justice is achieved through the optimization of individual well-being throughout the group, i.e. maintaining each individual's well being near the mean of the group.

Game theory, would suggest that in a changing dynamic world, with limited, yet growing resources; the reality of Justice as a virtue allows the group (a species) to profit from behavior such as empathy, and self-sacrifice; which would explain how said emotions have become embedded within many species throughout evolutionary time.

Karma expresses the flow of well-being towards achieving Justice as it relates our evolved emotional responses to events and our actions. It is similar to keeping count of standard deviations from the mean.

Many ways of achieving justice have bean thought out; most religions deal extensively on the subject as do all political systems. In the end; justice as something more complex than even the simplest cooperative games is NP - complete and we will continue forever changing and optimizing our laws and beliefs regarding our communal well-being to our current situations.

As sentient being, I agree the pursuit of justice is a responsibility we hold to ourselves, it is crucial to our survival.

Heart Broken

I remember telling someone, on her porch one afternoon: "That's because you have never really had your heart broken, and I will do my best so it never is."

Although I consider the promise was kept, it's easy to falter and maybe believe an impeccable heart to be an unwanted gift. There is a story of an old man whose' wounded, grieving heart he would not trade for that of a boy. A beautifully intact heart which was so naively boasted through the town; the story ends with the boy giving the old man a piece of the suddenly incomplete organ, and is an analogy of giving one's self in love.

In that boys eyes, and specially in these times, Love is a sentiment too often confused with desire, and self-adorement (narcissism), so the phrase: 'you must loose something to understand its real worth' urges one to believe a heart must be broken / given before one can understand its value, yet I believe in empathy. Time has bestowed upon life an infinitely powerful tool of comprehension, of understanding reality not only though our own eyes, but from those around us, of allowing us to share the responsibility of a better world.

It could be argued, that empathy is the root emotion behind the search for Justice (in another post, I quote a French philosopher who state Justice is an invention of man, and as such a responsibility of man unto himself.) So, if Love is a sentiment to be put to good use it must be born though Empathy, Comprehension, Dedication, Patience and Understanding, it must be a sentiment of Sharing, of reciprocal Trust and Cooperative Growth.

I recently heard a song: "What is love without lust" (La Roux - In For The Kill) and its something little short of coming from the black bible and a willingness to over-weigh self-adulation, self-fulfillment above all other things.

In that sense, and living through heart-breaks myself, there will always be choices in life. Choosing to be heart broken, is just as selfish as choosing lust. Evolution has seen to it so that our empathy, and sense of justice, prohibit us from attaining happiness if not through what we have identified as the virtues of life.

Some references:

• LifeScience - Study: People Literally Feel Pain of Others
• Roots of Empathy
• BBC News - Monkeys show sense of justice
• Shareable - Birds do It. Bats do It.
• Love of All Wisdom - Can justice make you happy?
• Suite101 - The Psychopath Antisocial
• Wikipedia - Psycopathy

I just can't keep it to myself

My mom, like the guy in this story has decided to invade my personal choices with her own opinion. She has started a campaign of sprinkling holy water on me now...

Its fun seeing her give me gods blessing and drawing the cross on my forehead; often times I struggle against the urge of playing some prank on her, like yelling: It Burns, It Burns!. I strongly suspect she'd fall to the floor and pray, my lord forgive him, my lord save him. Or something less dramatical, like fake a small wince, and have her spray a little more, and hug me. and then play around with that; but hey, I choose not to, specially since God would punish me if I did.

As a closing argument; an 18 year old boy speaks on why he has chosen to ignore faith: MilenaC

My new phone

0.9999... == 1

How can 0.9999... be equal to one? Won't a little always be missing? "Embrace the power of infinity"...

A daimond in the rough

Just as bad seeds grow in beautiful gardens, you can sometimes find a gorgeous soul amongst corrupted minds. Variety such a beautiful burden... Synonymous to existance...

Day after Thanksgiving.

Yesterday I was reminded about my writing on relationships last year, and was asked how my thoughts on the subject had changed... still, one year later, the gist of the admittedly polar dissertation remains.

There is one note we could extract from an economist's super-rational model of the mind; one simple addition: the role of Wanting, It is simply too painful to accept a partner's loss of interest, yet; beyond reasonable justification, illusion falls prey to reality and change inevitably looms over previous conception of a relationship; making the desire to sustain it either weaker or stronger.

In other words, Love must be fleeting to require hard work and understanding, and some form of self-realization is inextricable from maintaining a healthy relationship. In this tone I give thanks to every human being who finds self-realization in the happiness of others; you are the essence of humanity and the pillars of its achievements.